Everybody Wants To Rule the World
by Baby Darth Dalloway
Summary: Alison's thoughts after meeting Cyrus and some explanation as to why she's been lying and why she needs to keep Emily at arms length. She thinks about Emily, and we drift back in time to hear about the Kissing Rock story. A little bit of sadness but some happy memories too, and hope for the Emison future! EMISON One-shot. And surprise! NO spoilers for once! XD R


Everybody Wants to Rule the World

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Song of inspiration is the Lorde cover of the same name as the title. It immediately made me think of Ali. I also bought the Digital Daggers album, they made that song that plays at the end of the season 4 premiere. Great album, super dark though. For once, this fic does not have spoilers, repeat, DOES NOT have spoilers, haha. I hope you all enjoy! And please review to let me know how I'm doing, please and thank you. Now, on with the story! ^_^

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Emily was done with Alison… right? That's what she had so passionately yelled at the blonde, her face crumbling as she told the one person she genuinely loved that she stopped believing in her. Alison didn't know what to think anymore as she strolled out of the woods in her new brown wig, leaving Cyrus behind and hoping he would remain a distant memory. At the very least, she won this round of chess with A, managing to utilize Cyrus to not only create a story to get the cops off of her back but also manage to outsmart A's little trap. Whoever the bitch was, they probably were not expecting Ali to walk so boldly into the situation. Alison smirked to herself as her boots hit pavement. She may not have the upper hand in this situation still, but there was no doubt she was a formidable opponent in any arena, especially if it involved lying, mind games and manipulation. A was clearly still in control, but tonight she had managed a small victory. It still didn't take away the sting of Emily leaving her, a pain aching in her chest.

She wished she could have been more honest with Em, but she knew deep down she had to keep a space between them, this buffer being the only thing keeping Emily safe at the moment. Alison sighed as she walked through the empty town. If A wanted anything for Alison, it was absolute torment. One doesn't just kill a gal's mother and send her a taunting video of her burial because they want to get to know her. It was clear that A wanted to hit Alison where it hurt, in the few places she did have weak spots, the loss of her mother being one of them.

Though Ali wished she could say she didn't love her mother, especially after the woman buried her, she did. What hurt even more was not having the answer as to why she would commit such a heinous act. What was so worth protecting? The question would not cease nagging Alison, and every time her mind wandered to it, she could only clench her teeth in frustration. There were so many unknowns, so many things left unsaid, too many bodies being piled up. The last thing she wanted was more death. She thought of Emily.

Emily had been the ever-loyal friend she always had been, and Alison had known from the start that this A would know everything about their dynamic…which was why Ali had to play it safe. She was hoping Emily would have accepted her answers tonight, that she would still remain her friend and companion, but Ali already knew that Emily was the last connection of hope to her and all of their friends. Now that Emily was no longer on her side, she was sure all of the girls would be unified against her now.

It was frustrating for Alison coming back to Rosewood. She had thought her biggest concern would be the revamped Loser Mona, but she had hoped that her and Emily could finally be together, could finally be honest. As soon as the bomb went off in Toby's house and A waltzed back into their lives, Alison knew she could no longer pursue any form of romance with Emily, their intimacy being so brief and slowing down significantly soon after, Alison seeing the confusion flow through Emily. It was too dangerous.

A clearly wanted Alison to suffer the most unbearable amount of pain possible, targeting any of the open spots in her armor, Cyrus's attack being another vulnerability she hated to remember. But out of all of these things, situations and people, there was one loss Alison knew she could never handle, would never be able to forgive herself for, and that would be losing Emily...permanently. She felt herself shiver at the thought.

Alison continued her stroll through town, and made it back into the woods, crossing her arms as she felt that all too familiar feeling of dread fill her gut. She could barely handle the possibility of Emily being hurt in such a way… Alison had already experienced saving Emily from near death twice, but these were attacks at random. If A found out Alison's true feelings for the girl, the attempt might become all the more malicious and gruesome. Alison took a deep breath and held back tears at the thought.

Emily Fields had been the one good thing in her life, and Alison regretted not realizing it back then when she could have done things so differently. The blonde bombshell had an incomparable ego at far too young an age, playing games and toying with people since the 6th grade, and after meeting CeCe Drake, the ante was upped. She was drunk off of the power she held, the keen intelligence that Spencer did not even realize was as sharp as her own was formidable, the beauty, the seductive streak, her ability to look through a person and know them upon first meeting. Alison ruled Rosewood, and not only the school system. She was too ambitious, malicious and controlling for her own good, and it made her forget that there were good things to have in this world… like Emily.

When Alison realized Emily was gay, everything clicked for her. She thought back to the day at the lunch table and how she wanted to rip Ben a new one for talking about her friend that way, Alison's protective streak menacing. But once Alison saw Emily eyeing Jenna, she found an entirely new dynamic to toy with, one she had never had the opportunity to play with before. She wouldn't just have her good friend loyally standing by her side. She would have Emily in a way she had never had another woman before, or friend. She would have Emily's complete devotion; something she had always wanted but never realized could run so much deeper. Emily was the sweetest and most loving person she had ever met, and her friendship had been the only place where Ali could let down her guard. She wanted that, and if she could keep Emily in a place where that devotion would remain eternal, Alison would seize the opportunity, and so she did.

Emily loving Alison meant that Ali had a safe where her tender feelings and the good parts of her heart could reside. They would stay safer with Emily the devoted lover versus Emily the simply devoted friend, and because these parts of Alison were the most invaluable to her, she wanted them to have the utmost protection. She needed them to be guarded, knowing Emily would only treat them with the kindness, tenderness and support they needed. Alison sighed out as she closed upon her house. She only wished she had realized WHY she wanted Emily to have those pieces of her when she had the opportunity to act.

Alison couldn't let what Emily had of her become public knowledge. She was a queen, ruling with a velvet fist, and the last thing she wanted or needed back then was to join the rainbow parade and braid her girlfriend's hair, skipping merrily down the street. That was someone Alison DiLaurentis refused to be, and while she kept Emily's eyes set on her, she also kept Emily at arm's length. For every kiss she gave, every glance, every touch, every kind and loving expression, every flirtation, Alison took several things away, like Emily's esteem, her sanity, her dignity, her self-worth and her love. Alison wanted Emily firmly secured near her as she went off dating older boys and seducing everything that moved. She locked away her ability to be kind and to love with Emily, using every tease and taunt to make sure the kindness she did in fact possess would rarely be seen. No one saw the Alison that Emily did. It was why all of this hurt so much.

After Emily had written her that letter, Alison realized she would have to do something to make things better, but she still wanted to be the girl who had the hottest older boyfriend. She couldn't be with a woman, she just couldn't. The letter nagged at her insides, but Ali didn't really have time to think about Emily until maybe weeks after someone smashed a rock into her head, Alison's hand unconsciously grazing the scar on her scalp. She shivered again at the memory, finally reaching her house and climbing inside, sneaking her way back to bed.

She hid her wig and costume in secret places in the house, and got into her bed, but she couldn't sleep. All she could feel was regret, worry and a gnawing fear. What if Emily never took her back?

Ali thought back to her time on the run and how when she reflected on everything, from her friendship dynamics, to the way she bullied people, the betrayal of her own mother, and the fact someone tried to kill her. She learned she had to change. Perhaps it was a serious karmic intervention in many ways, Alison wondering who her friends would have turned into, or not turned into, had her presence never left. In a way, she was grateful for many of their changes, Emily growing into the beautiful, strong, and yet incredibly loving mermaid Alison always saw her as. The blonde knew deep down she would have smothered Emily's growth, fearful she would do what she did tonight, understand her own self worth and know she didn't deserve any of this crap. Alison sighed again and rolled over. The problem was, it was different this time.

Alison had changed, but she wasn't lying when she told Emily she only trusted her. It wasn't just about Emily's love for her it was also due to the fact Alison _knew_ Emily, really knew her. She knew the girl didn't have a malicious bone in her body, not unless provoked into the loyal killer she could be as her attacker from weeks ago experienced first hand. But this was still a trustworthy trait. Alison knew Emily would never hurt her because she also would never intentionally hurt anyone if she could help it. It was her nature. The other girls though, they were a different ballgame.

Alison distrusted Spencer deeply, and of course Melissa and the rest of the Hastings family. Aria had always been Spencer's closest friend in the group, and Aria had plenty of reasons to hate Ali. Hanna was so resentful towards Alison for becoming a mini-version of her that she would hate her regardless, and the three of them clearly were uncomfortable with Emily around her. She did not trust her friends, even though she still cared for them. Alison had accepted she would have to earn all of the their trust… she never told them that they also had to earn back hers, Emily aside.

And so Ali could nothing as she lay in bed, and the realization of this brought tears to her eyes. She had to keep Emily away because any hint from A that the girl meant anything important to her would lead Emily to an unfortunate demise. She couldn't tell Emily this though as the girl's passion, love and overall stubbornness would push to make them be together, at least here and there. But Alison knew all too well, they only needed one slip up. It was not worth the risk.

She thought back to several hours before, every word Emily yelled at her on repeat in her mind. The only thing that gave Ali a glimmer of hope was the fact that Emily believed she was turning in an innocent man. She couldn't let Emily or any of the girls in on her plan or the arrangement she made with Cyrus. The more people who knew about these things, the greater the risk A would find out. She already knew one of them had lost the recording device and practically handed it to A. Things were too risky.

Deep down, Alison believed what she had told Emily tonight. She believed once A was finally caught, once the secrets her mother had been hiding and once this psychopath was finally unmasked, she would finally have her second chance in Rosewood. She could only hope that once everything was out in the open, once Emily understood why she did what she did in order to protect her, she would be forgiven. Her heart ached deeply, regretting ever stringing the beautiful brunette along, wishing she had 'practiced' more with Emily back then, only understanding too late that it was never practice at all. For Ali, it had been real. If only Emily had known.

The blonde felt herself drift to sleep, and as she did, her mind took her back to a happier time before all of this insanity started…

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_3 years ago_

_Alison was surprised she had managed to get Emily to sneak out, but she coaxed the girl into leaving her bed and home in the middle of the night with the guilt trip that Alison would soon be heading to the beach for her summer vacation. Alison knew Emily's feelings for her would give her enough of a push, the thought of the blonde leaving her for most of the summer a sad and daunting notion. She told Emily she wanted to spend some time alone with her, just the two of them, the night before she departed. _

_Ali told Emily to meet her behind Spencer's house right at midnight, promising her she had a treat in store for them. Emily was of course all nerves as she crept out of her house, knowing Alison's idea of a fun time could easily land them in some trouble. She sighed and rolled her eyes, just praying that she would not get arrested for something tonight._

_Emily pulled her hoodie tighter around her as she trekked to the Hastings house, the spring air still brisk at this hour. She was running a few minute lates and kxnew the blonde would probably become impatient. She snuck through the woods and made it to Spencer's barn, seeing Alison looking at her phone impatiently, backpack in hand._

"_Well now I know we're definitely not going to a party if you brought a backpack of all things," Emily said gently and full of smiles, teasing Alison lightly about the fact she was far too pristine to tote something as simple as a backpack around. The blonde looked up from her phone and smirked._

"_It's not that kind of night. I told you, it's just you and me," she replied sweetly, the intensity of her gaze making Emily blush and look away. The brunette yearned for these moments, these flirtations, constantly, but was still so shy whenever she received one. Alison chuckled lightly giving Emily a flashlight to navigate them through the dark. Emily took it and was surprised when Ali extended her hand to her. _

"_Come on."_

_Emily took the shorter girls hand, the pair dressed down in jeans, sneakers and hoodies as they gallivanted through the woods. Emily was getting more curious about where they were headed, but she didn't want to ruin the serenity of the moment, Ali's hand in hers as they quietly went along. Alison was enjoying the silence for once. It was always so simple with Emily, so tranquil. When it was just the two of them, she could be herself. There wasn't a game or a lie involved. Alison could just be. She glanced over at Emily in the dark. She smiled as she watched the brunette who was clearly lost in thought._

"_Don't look so nervous Em. You should know where we are headed."_

_Emily turned her head back to look at Alison, startled from her thoughts. She gave a half smile and squeezed the blonde's hand, letting her know she trusted her. It wasn't long before Emily realized they were going to what Ali referred to as 'their spot.'_

_It took them quite a while in the dark, but Emily saw the trees begin to clear as the place known as the Kissing Rock fast approached them. As they walked over to the rock in the middle of the clearing, Alison placed the backpack down gently, opening it up and pulling out what looked like a camping lantern. She switched it on and the brightness made the surrounding area far easier to see. Emily rubbed her hands together and looked up at the night sky. The stars were gorgeous tonight. _

"_Don't you want to know what else I have in here?" Alison asked teasingly. Emily just smiled, shaking her head and walking over to see what Ali was pulling out. Emily looked at the silver can curiously, trying to figure out what it was, until Alison turned it to show her the label._

"_Spray paint? What are we going to do with that?"_

_A smirk played on Alison's lips._

"_What do you think?"_

"_I …wouldn't it be mean to spray the rock? People have written stuff on there..."_

"_Exactly. And now, we are too."_

_Emily still looked confused as she watched Alison crouch down in front of her, the blonde finding a patch a side of the rock that she liked and started her work. Emily watched her go about her task, and it wasn't until Ali leaned back that she saw what she created. Emily felt her jaw go slack, shocked Alison would put their initials there._

"_Hm…but I think it's missing something…" Alison thought out loud, looking at it and trying to decide what would make it even better. Emily just stood over her completely in a daze. But then, she relaxed._

_It was moments like these, brief moments, where Emily felt that she was seeing Alison for who she really was. She wasn't sure why Ali continued to toy with her in the way that she did. She didn't know what Ali thought at all really. All she knew was that deep down under her rough exterior, Alison had genuine moments of sweetness, and it was in these brief moments Emily didn't have to be on alert for an attack from the girl. She could just be with her too. _

"_Here," Emily whispered as she crouched down next to Alison, extending her hand for the can while tucking a loose strand behind her ear. Ali handed it over, watching Emily look at the rock and go to work. The brunette had never tagged something before in her life, let alone break a law, but as she drew a heart around their paired initials, she could care less if she got caught tonight. It would have been worth it._

_When she finished and pulled back, she saw Alison smiling fondly at their little creation. Ali really loved Emily as a friend, and quite possibly as something more. Alison wished it could only be that easy for her to be open about the fact that she cared so deeply for another human being, let alone a girl, but she knew tonight was just like all of their other interactions, something just between them, and something Alison never intended for others to find out about. She sighed at the thought._

"_What are you thinking about?" Emily asked. Ali turned to face her, a small smile on her lips, a rare dose of sincerity in her eyes, and Emily thought that in that gaze, Alison was trying to understand something, trying to figure out an answer as she looked into Emily's big brown eyes._

"_You," she whispered simply, and before Emily knew it, Alison was leaning forward and kissing her soundly on the lips. It was brief and innocent, and Emily had just barely closed her eyes before it ended. Alison leaned back and gave a half smile, quickly getting to her feet, Emily slightly bewildered but following her lead._

"_It's about time we head back, I do have to get up early tomorrow."_

_Emily understood that they were back to their roles now, and nodded silently, letting this place, this moment, that kiss, become a memory she would never forget. It was their little secret. _

_Alison turned off the small lamp and packed everything back up and began walking to the edge, Emily in tow. The blonde didn't reach out this time, but Emily decided if Alison could be bold, so could she, and she slipped her fingers through Ali's who reciprocated the hold._

_They walked for some time, the reality of Alison leaving finally hitting Emily. _

"_What's wrong?"_

"_Huh? Oh, um, nothing…I just.." Alison watched her in the darkness._

"_I'm just going to miss you, that's all."_

_Alison half-smiled again._

"_I'll miss you too Em."_

_They eventually arrived back at the Hastings, though Emily insisted on walking Ali back towards her house. Before departing, Alison hugged her and whispered her goodbyes, telling her to not have too much fun while she was gone. Emily watched her sneak back inside, wishing they could have departed with more than a hug._

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Alison finally woke up, the sun rays pouring in through her room, recalling her dream, or rather, her memory from right before she got away for the summer. That following morning, she had woken in a similar fashion too. Alison looked at the clock and saw it was nearly time to get up. She threw herself back onto the bed and decided she would not be going to school today. She could at least use her 'escaped kidnapper' as an excuse. The last thing she wanted was to witness her friends icing her out, and after last nights dream, she knew the only thing on her mind would be the thought of Emily's lips.

Alison rolled over and snuggled into the covers. She had no idea where she was going to go from here. The only thing she could do was find A, and stay alive while doing so. Until she made that happen, she would have to hold on to her memories with Emily and hold on to the belief that at least after that was accomplished, she could start making new some new ones, with her girl.

FIN

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Why hellloooooo everyone! ^_^ It's been a bit of a while, at least it feels a while! I just started my job and it's been a long week! Working full-time is very different from school, but what can you do. Anywho, I wanted to write a one-shot to give Alison some humanity. I have to say, the whole Emison vs Paily hate debate seems to have gotten cray cray! I've gotten so irritated I finally gave in and got a Tumblr page so I could start posting my pro-emison/ positive Ali thoughts. I've had some great conversations with people on here, from writers and readers alike, and it's been wonderful to create a dialogue. So why not share it?

If you're interested, I actually wrote a post today about why I converted from a Paily shipper to an Emison one. If you didn't know this, I was not always an Emison-shipper! I know, blasphemy. I'm on board now though! I was just fashionably late to this party. Anyway, I feel like I gave valid argumentation for my reasoning, and you can go check out what I said at alisadvocateDOTtumblrDOTcom. I realize how corny that sounds, believe me, but it fit for what I use it for.

Anywho! That's enough from me for now. We will get through this Emison hiatus! Even if we become fanfiction dependent in order to do so! XD ~Until next time


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